Wednesday, November 17, 2010

My first baby!



I am sort of walking around in a fog today. I already cried twice before 8:00am. Why you ask? Because my first born is turning 11. 11 years ago I became a mother. Well actually I felt like a mother the minute I found out I was pregnant with her. I sort of felt that protective feeling that my life really meant so much more now that I was this baby’s mother. She changed my life, she has been my constant. She is really her mother’s daughter. I understand her dramatics and over reactions to the tiniest things, she is my daughter. I understand her frustration with her naturally curly beautiful hair, she is my daughter. I understand her love for creatures big and small, she is my daughter. I sometimes look at her and think to myself about how truly lucky I am to have been given the opportunity to have this special person in my life. Right now her life is full of soccer friends, tv and movies, the next meal and socializing. Her life is not full of studying or a strong work ethic but we are working on that. I see the truest part of her when she is mothering her baby brother. While she argues constantly with Jackson she reserves her most loving mothering care and concern for her baby brother. She takes her time with him and cares for him. I sort of grin because I know if there is any proof that I was a good mother it will be in the way she mothers. I won’t share that with her yet, I still need her to believe that babies are poop diapers and no sleep. Thank you god for allowing me to raise your angel. I love her with all my heart.


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